The Twelve Years of Grad School

Sung to the tune of "The Twelve Days of Christmas"

© 1996 by the Cornell Catholic Community Graduate Forum
All Rights Reserved
Presented at the CCC Coffee House Variety Show, November 16, 1996

In the First Year of Grad School, My Program gave to Me:

a Ph.D. Review Committee.

In the Second Year of Grad School, My Program gave to Me:

2 Years of Coursework,
and a Ph.D. Review Committee.

In the Third Year of Grad School, My Program gave to Me:

3 "A" - Exams,
2 More Years of Coursework,
and a Ph.D. Review Committee.

In the Fourth Year of Grad School, My Program gave to Me:

4 Thesis Topics,
3 "A" - Exams,
2 More Years of Coursework,
and a Ph.D. Review Committee.

In the Fifth Year of Grad School, My Program gave to Me:

5 Hours of Sleep!
4 More Thesis Topics,
3 "A" - Exams,
2 More Years of Coursework,
and a Ph.D. Review Committee.

In the Sixth Year of Grad School, My Program gave to Me:

6 Cups of Coffee,
5 Hours of Sleep!
(Bah Dum-Bum-Bum!)
4 More Thesis Topics,
3 "A" - Exams,
2 More Years of Coursework,
and a Ph.D. Review Committee.

In the Seventh Year of Grad School, My Program gave to Me:

7 Crying Freshmen,
6 Cups of Coffee,
5 Hours of Sleep!
(Bah-Dum-Bum-Bum!)
4 More Thesis Topics,
3 "A" - Exams,
2 More Years of Coursework,
and a Ph.D. Review Committee.

In the Eighth Year of Grad School, My Program gave to Me:

8 Computer Crashes,
7 Crying Freshmen,
6 Pots of Coffee,
5 Hours of Sleep!
(Bah-Dum-Bum-Bum!)
4 More Thesis Topics,
3 "A" - Exams,
2 More Years of Coursework,
and a Ph.D. Review Committee.

In the Ninth Year of Grad School, My Program gave to Me:

9 Pounds of Paperwork,
8 Computer Crashes,
7 Crying Freshmen,
6 Pots of Coffee,
5 Minutes of Sleep!
(Bah-Dum-Bum-Bum!)
4 More Thesis Topics,
3 "A" - Exams,
2 More Years of Coursework,
and a Ph.D. Review Committee.

In the Tenth Year of Grad School, My Program gave to Me:

10 Thesis Rewrites,
9 Forms in Triplicate,
8 Computer Crashes,
7 Crying Freshmen,
6 Pots of Coffee,
5 Minutes of Sleep!
(Bah-Dum-Bum-Bum!)
4 More Thesis Topics,
3 "A" - Exams,
2 More Years of Coursework,
and a Ph.D. Review Committee.

In the Eleventh Year of Grad School, My Program gave to Me:

11 Rejection Letters,
10 Thesis Rewrites,
9 Pounds of Paperwork,
8 Computer Crashes,
7 Crying Freshmen,
6 Pounds of Coffee,
5 Seconds of Sleep!
(Bah-Dum-Bum-Bum!)
4 More Thesis Topics,
3 "A" - Exams,
2 More Years of Coursework,
and a Ph.D. Review Committee.

In the Twelfth Year of Grad School, My Program gave to Me:

a 12 Year Post-Doc,
11 Rejection Letters,
10 Thesis Rewrites,
9 Forms in Triplicate,
8 Computer Crashes,
7 Crying Freshmen,
6 Pounds of Coffee,
5 Seconds of Sleep!
(Bah-Dum-Bum-Bum!)
4 More Thesis Topics,
3 "A" - Exams,
2 More Years of Coursework,
and a Ph.D. Review Committee ! !